Millennials Une deux, une deux trois We are the Millennials, the perennials of paucity and awesome audicity. We are the bad boys in the locker room talking dirty. Une deux, une deux trois We are the cool fools—the coolest ever—of frivolous, fabulous dreams. Want to know true emptiness, dude? Join us in the locker room with your laptop. Une deux, une deux trois We are the original superficial image of all things imitated. We are the copy of the copy of the copy ... Press PrtSc on your keyboard. Une deux, une deux trois We are the rock star in the loser's bar, the baffling reality raffling infinite nothingness to nobody. We are the "in crowd" of the "out crowd" no matter how you spin us across all space and time. Une deux, une deux trois We are Uber this and Uber that aber unter alles unrecht, schlecht. We can get you nowhere fast, little Googoolians. Une deux, une deux trois And we are Airbnb—nothing to do with fresh air, rest, or nourishment—fair rent being a thing of the past. Take a hike, trash! Suicide is painless, painless sameness. Do it now; rid us of your clutter. Une deux, une deux trois We are, we are ... Segue to city promo: "This is who we are. Ye ye ye ye ye. Exactly!" From a far star on a world not spun for fun and youth's amusement, a small voice asks, "But exactly what?" But no one hears because there is really no one in back of the band barking for blood where there is none. Fun flickers, dies, cries. Ein zwei, ein zwei drei, heil Millennial!
	—By Louis Martin